Factory Settings
Lately, I've been having some deep conversations with some really amazing people who have either been in my life for some time, or have just entered my life. And those conversations have helped me realize some things. The biggest one, is a concept I like to call our personal factory settings.
When we were kids, we were ourselves with no apologizes. We said weird things, we dreamed without limits, we dressed to express ourselves. We were who we were supposed to be before society got their constricting hands on us, telling us what to say, wear, look and act like, and who to love. We loved to move, play, create, sing, learn, and explore. That is who we are supposed to be.
When I was about two years old, my parents asked me what I wanted to be for Halloween. I took my pacifier out of my mouth to respond, "A Christmas tree!" Their response was, "No, you're going to be a ballerina!" I'm sure I didn't think much of it, seeing as I was only two years old, but I can't help but think what my life would be like if I had in fact been a Christmas tree for Halloween that year. Would that have lead to more amazingly weird and creative ideas? Who knows....
But now, almost 22 years later, I am going to be a Christmas tree for Halloween this year. It is my goal for going into my 24th year of life, to try and go back to my factory settings before I hid myself away because I was so afraid of what society was going to say and do to me if they saw who I really was. Not anymore. I have worked so hard this past year working towards being happy and being more confident in myself. Now it's time for the next step, being confident in my factory settings. It's scary and I know people are not going to like it, but I'm not going to apologize, just like I didn't when I was a kid. It's time to take the power back from those who drove me into my shell. You better watch out!
When we were kids, we were ourselves with no apologizes. We said weird things, we dreamed without limits, we dressed to express ourselves. We were who we were supposed to be before society got their constricting hands on us, telling us what to say, wear, look and act like, and who to love. We loved to move, play, create, sing, learn, and explore. That is who we are supposed to be.
When I was about two years old, my parents asked me what I wanted to be for Halloween. I took my pacifier out of my mouth to respond, "A Christmas tree!" Their response was, "No, you're going to be a ballerina!" I'm sure I didn't think much of it, seeing as I was only two years old, but I can't help but think what my life would be like if I had in fact been a Christmas tree for Halloween that year. Would that have lead to more amazingly weird and creative ideas? Who knows....
But now, almost 22 years later, I am going to be a Christmas tree for Halloween this year. It is my goal for going into my 24th year of life, to try and go back to my factory settings before I hid myself away because I was so afraid of what society was going to say and do to me if they saw who I really was. Not anymore. I have worked so hard this past year working towards being happy and being more confident in myself. Now it's time for the next step, being confident in my factory settings. It's scary and I know people are not going to like it, but I'm not going to apologize, just like I didn't when I was a kid. It's time to take the power back from those who drove me into my shell. You better watch out!
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